I was about thirteen when I first heard about the Gordian knot. If you aren’t familiar with it. It was a giant ass knot that supposedly nobody could undo. The story goes that Alexander the Great strode up to the knot, took one look, and said he could solve it. He then took out his sword and cut it entirely in half.

You could make a lot of metaphors out of that story. You could argue that any major life event could be the sword, destroying connections and lives. Yes, I am talking about divorce. But only in metaphors, not in details. You can call me a coward, whatever. My page, my rules.

I got to thinking about this because of the tradition of handfasting. Where two people are literally bound together in matrimony. Those cords are meant to grow and tie each other together further, producing beautiful knot works of love and friendship.

But what happens when the cords tie too close? When they knot into each other tighter and stronger. Suddenly you can feel more bound than you need to. That’s when you reach out and put strings out in other directions. Life isn’t meant to be a knot, it should be a web.

And we can lose sight of that. I have anxious attachment style and ADHD. I can get very wound up in someone. And it becomes another thing thats web related. The person so wrapped up in layers placed around them they don’t see what they’ve lost around them. They’re cocooned and can’t see what’s around them. Some people do it to themselves, others have it done to them by narcissists and sociopaths.

When that cocoon breaks away, and the person can breath again, they may feel like they’re falling. In that case, we, as a species, need to reach out. To extend our web to them. To let them know they’re not alone. To catch them in our web. People can argue that its not safe, that extending those webs could get you hurt.

They’re right. You’re going to get hurt. But it took me a long time to learn that in order to get to the love, you’re going to have to get hurt. Sometimes, the ones you love the most will hurt you. But not maliciously, or on purpose. That’s not love. But getting to the understanding of where people’s motivation are takes time and patience, a commodity sorely lacking.

I’m trying to rebuild my web. My girlfriend is making sure I don’t hide myself away in a cocoon of my own fears and regrets. She challenges me to make new connections and live authentically, to be a better person than I have been . ANd this is my challenge to you, Extend your webs. Make connections with others, and not just the people you see every day. But some of them might be worth getting to know too.

I’ll be out and about Saturday night. If anyone’s reading this who I haven’t met, holler at me then. Or even if you have met me and want to get to know me better, let’s do something about it. I’m looking for good people to show me how to be a better one. And at the very least, I’ll have someone new to tell all my stories to. Good night.