I’m sorry, this post is not going to be sweetness and light. It’s not going to feel like it’s positive. But I think there’s something we need to talk about, as a culture, society and civilization: Stop. Telling . People. How. They. Feel.

Is that clear enough? Stop telling people they never felt a certain way. Or that they did feel a certain way. Are you psychic? And if you are, why aren’t you rich? Where do you get the nerve to tell somebody that? It’s ego and hubris of the highest order.

They’ll say “I know them better than they know themselves” Yeah, sure you do. Nobody knows what’s in a person’s heart. They will surprise you, amaze you, and blindside you. You can be as close asa brother, and still never know.

My ex best friend, Brian, showed me that. Came to me, told me he couldn’t be in my wedding. I asked him why. The feds busted him for child pornography. I never saw it coming, Looking back, saw all the signs I missed. Totally blindsided.

You know how to know someone? Curiosity. Find out things, pay attention. Get to know them. We’re a village, folks, like it or not. Better to know somewhat who you’re dealing with. I’m not saying it’s perfect. People have hidden lives, hidden thoughts. But if we treat others with interest and respect, it’s amazing what things will unfold. Like Walden said, be curious, not judgmental.

Telling people how they’re feeling is gaslighting, straight up. Don’t do it. And yes, I’ve been guilty of it, so save your cards and letters. But I want to do better, and recognize my mistakes. We need to stop making this one, and do better. Good night